Men are just happier people

[Arbman Al]

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MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE][/align]



NICKNAMES

• If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
• If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionatelyrefer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT

• When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throwin $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them willhave anything smaller and none will actually admit they wantchange back.
• When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY

• A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
• A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need butit's on sale.

BATHROOMS

• A man has seven items in his bathroom: toothbrush andtoothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, shampoo anda towel...
• The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroomis 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 ofthese items.

ARGUMENTS

• A woman has the last word in any argument.
• Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a newargument.

FUTURE

• A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
• A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS

• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wifecan spend.
• A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE

• A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
• A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP

• A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants,empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get themail.
• A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL

• Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
• Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING

• Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. Sheknows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends,favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
• A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in thehouse.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY



A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!

[grahamb]

imported post

these are excellent Al. I have just read a few of them to Mrs B and she agreed with them!